My friends and I once attempted
to develop a feature length film. I
should probably back up a bit. This was back
when we were in elementary school (I’m thinking seventh or eighth grade), and
films featuring ninja were widespread.
Having recently experienced the warped insanity of Kosei Saito’s The Ninja Wars (most
likely rented from the local Hollywood Video), we were inspired. The other big thing that was going on in the
world of cinema (at least as far as twelve-year-old boys were concerned) was
the avalanche of low-rent Action films from the stables of such studios as Cannon
Films. Consequently, our film couldn’t
just have plain, old ninja. They had to
be ninja who also used machine guns and pistols. At any rate, a “script” was written (most
likely by hand in composition book), and it was as juvenile and threadbare as
you’re imagining.
As you might suspect, problems quickly
arose. For starters, we couldn’t decide
on who was going to play the lead (who also got to kiss the heroine). None of us knew the first thing about martial
arts outside of what we’d seen on screen (and we sure as shit couldn’t duplicate
even that much). None of us had a ninja
uniform (and none of us could afford one from the ads in such magazines
as…well…Ninja). Probably most damning of all was the fact
that none of us had a camera with which to film our magnum opus (although I
would argue that the dearth of ninja outfits was a very close second). Once a few weeks or months of trying to
outthink reality had passed, we conceded that our totally awesome ninja movie
would never take shape. But the world is
not poorer for this lack. We still have
plenty of films made in kids’ backyards (go check out some back issues of Cinemagic, if you doubt me), and if even
something like Michael J. Murphy’s Death Run can see some form of release,
there simply has to be hope for every starry-eyed child filmmaker out there.
Paul (Rob Bartlett) and his girlfriend Jenny (Wendy Parsons) are put into suspended animation by Paul’s doctor
mother (Kay Lowrey), as a nuclear
holocaust tears civilization apart outside their bunker. Waking up twenty-five years in the future for
no discernible reason other than to start the film, they discover that the
world is full of mutants on one side and post-apocalyptic punks on the
other. The latter are centralized in
Junk City and ruled over by the villainous-just-by-looking-at-him Messiah (Patrick Olliver), a claw-handed sadist
who splits the lovers apart and forces Paul to run the eponymous “obstacle
course.”
The reason why I mention this
film in the same breath as my and my friends’ abortive cinematic attempt is
because I like to think that, had we been successful, the end result would
likely have been similar in quality to Death
Run. It’s clear from the very first
frames here that the film was made for a budget upon which even a shoestring
would feel pity. Most interior shots
appear to be lit with a single light source (possibly a flashlight). Cuts rarely match. The majority of the actors look like they
used their own clothes for their wardrobe (the one exception being Messiah, but
you never know). The whole film is
post-dubbed (whether because it was filmed on a non-sync system or they couldn’t
afford sound equipment or they could and the soundtrack turned out like crap, I
couldn’t say), and the voices rarely match the actors’ lips. The actors also seem to be very careful about
not only not making contact with their fellow thespians in the action scenes
but also about not giving the impression that they could have for the camera’s
sake. I’m unfamiliar with the heavy
metal bands and/or songs used copiously on the soundtrack, but I wouldn’t be in
the least bit surprised if one or more of them listed some of the film’s actors
as members. The mutant makeups are
largely slapped on bits of colored latex with bladders threatening to make them
pop off the actors’ skin.
But despite the movie being
strictly amateur hour, it manages to be astonishingly well-paced, partly
because it’s only a little over an hour long and partly because it wastes
absolutely none of its time on extraneous things like exposition,
characterization, et cetera. The
filmmakers jump in with both feet, hit the ground running, and simply don’t let
up. It’s also clear that the people
behind this were forthright about their work.
How else do you explain the extraordinarily homoerotic, extraordinarily
straight-faced training montage (including shirtless one-armed pushups,
shirtless grappling, and shirtless military presses done with a log)? And yet, they’re also clearly having fun,
because why else carry something like this all the way to distribution unless
you are? Plus, it’s evident that there
are no boundaries in what can and will happen to the characters, so there is an
element of tension just to see which of the cardboard cutouts makes it to the
final credits (you might be surprised).
This, combined with the film taking the time to hit every single Action/Post-Apocalyptic
genre cliché ever invented (okay, that’s maybe an exaggeration, since they
clearly didn’t have the money for the bigger effects, but the point remains the
same), gives just enough of a mix between the familiar and the unexpected to
make the viewer not want to scream throughout the experience.
The most interesting aspect of
the film is the Adam and Eve element that’s supposed to be embodied (in
conception if not necessarily execution) by Paul and Jenny. They are literally reborn into a new world of
which they have no knowledge. They are
supposed to be the saviors of the human race or the progenitors of a new, “clean”
(read: non-irradiated) race (the only conceivable reason to put your scion into
cryogenic suspension during a nuclear war; it’s not as if the world is going to
become more hospitable down the road from there). The young couple transform from beings of
innocence (which is not strictly true, since they went to sleep as young
adults) into beings formed (one could say corrupted) by the world in which they
find themselves. The knowledge gained is
beneficial for survival but not necessarily “good” since it brings with it much
suffering. Thankfully, the film does its
best to ease the pain (for the audience, at any rate), so no harm, no foul.
MVT: The earnest attitude of
the filmmakers is reflected in every frame of the film, and, I have to say, it
is infectious.
Make or Break: I can’t give
out details, but the Make is the scene where our group meets up with a gang of
rebels. It’s actually shocking for
what’s revealed in the action as well as how this affects our protagonists.
Score: 6.25/10
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