The Last Stand (2013)

Sometimes you have to trust your instincts,and in the case of The Last Stand,that's what i should have done when i saw this at the cinema. Considering that this was supposed to be the long awaited return of Schwarzenegger to the big screen (not counting Expendables 1 & 2),i couldn't help but have a distinctly underwhelming feeling about it. The poster was so-so,the trailer even more so (not helped by the presence of Johnny Knoxville) and yet there was a certain curiousity value about it....an action god that we worshipped in the 80's,and to some extent in the 90's. But like i said,i should have  trusted my instincts....

I must stress that The Last Stand is not an awful film - not by a long shot. It entertains,and that's all a film has to really do,but it's definitely a lacklustre effort which comes as a surprise when it's been directed by Kim Ji-woon who directed The Good,The Bad And The Weird and I Saw The Devil,both films which were exhilarating in their own individual way. However,those films were not your typical fare...they were both unconventional films with which risks could be taken,and perhaps Ji-Woon was hampered in what he could do with The Last Stand which is about as conventional as you can get.

But i'm skirting around the real problem with the film - Arnold Schwarzenegger. As much as it pains me to say this as a fan of his earlier films,it's difficult to take him as an action hero in this film. For the first half of the film,he doesn't do much at all and when the action does kick in,he's a static figure and the formidable screen presence he once had is barely evident it - and the one liners are as creaky as he is.

The Last Stand is not quite The Last Straw for me,but Arnold,you gotta do better. 6/10

 

Samurai Assassin (1965)

The year is 1860 and Japan is in a extremely unstable state. The 300 year rule of the Shogunate was drawing to a close, an event which would simultaneously bring Imperialism to Japan, and bring about the death of the Samurai age. This is the setting of Samurai Assassin, a highly complicated, and character driven Chambara film that is shot in brilliant black and white. It also features one of Toshiro Mifune's best performances, as well as an astounding finale that's just too cool for words.

Mifune plays Niiro Tsuruchiyo, a master-less samurai who joins forces with the multiple clans against the Lord of Hikone, Sir Li Kamonnokami Naosuke. Li is the right hand of the shogunate who brought upon himself the wrath of the Satsuma, Mito, and Choshuu provinces after making an unpopular choice for the appointment of the 14th shogunate. Many critics arouse after the controversial appointment and as a result Li initiated the Ansei Purge to quiet critics of his choices. This in turn, lead to an assassination plot hatched by the three provinces in order to remove Li from his position of power. Here enters Mifune, who wants to help the clans in order to become a samurai of the Mito house. If that's not enough, the clans have their own problems too trying to weed Li's spies out of the plot. As you can imagine it's a film full of intrigue, espionage, underhanded dealings, and of course assassinations. If all this sounds complicated...it's because it is.

Looking past the intricate plot of Samurai Assassin the film is basically a detailed character study of Mifune's Niiro. Much of the film deals with his mysterious past and is told through flashbacks. Some as first hand accounts, others through investigative interviews headed by the clan who is trying to root out Li's spies. This serves as both a negative and a positive for Assassin. While it helps develop Mifune's character (and he's excellent as always), it also slows the film to a snails pace. We also have a subplot about Niiro's past featuring a long story of forbidden love. The films first hour concerns itself mostly with these issues, while the second half slowly builds to an incredibly brutal finale.

Bottom line- Samurai Assassin takes some time to get where it's going and it suffers from pacing issues, but when it gets to its point it redeems most of the film's shortcomings. The finale is a brutal scene filmed in swirling clouds of snow and features an dizzying, blood soaked, action packed conclusion sure to satisfy any Chambara fan. 7.5/10

Instant Action: Top Gun (1986)

What do you get when a Goose, a Maverick, a Slider, and an Iceman play volleyball?

Written By: Jim Cash & Jack Epps Jr.
Directed By: Tony Scott

If there's one thing I know that I'd never be able to do in life it's pilot a fighter jet. My extreme motion sickness would rule me out right off the bat. However, if we were to take that out of the equation I still wouldn't be able to pilot a fighter jet. The reason for this is simple, it's far too complicated of a task for this old bloke. It's amazing to watch the footage that Tony Scott provides of the fighter jets in action during Top Gun. A cacophony of movement and visceral intent, the fighter jet action in Top Gun is meant to put the viewer at a comfortable distance. It's enjoyable to watch, it's exhilarating to take in, but it's not something the great majority of us can hope to understand. Mr. Scott takes us into this foreign world, and he infuses us with the sort of action that we wouldn't be able to partake in otherwise. That's the real strength, and beauty of Top Gun, the effortless nature with which Mr. Scott orchestrates the fighter jet action.

The same cannot be said for the romance or the trite story that makes up Top Gun. These elements of the film are all too easy to understand because they are so vapid and shallow. There's no real romance between Maverick and Charlie, there's but quick glances and creepy kisses under the waning sun (seriously, who the hell licks the roof of someone's mouth?) The story is in much the same vein, the all too easy to tap into vein that is. A group of super charged macho men are vying for some sort of title, and to get they need to do manly things. That's the extent of the base story in Top Gun, and it is in the script of Jim Cash and Jack Epps Jr. that Top Gun lets down the viewer the most. The great action delivered by Mr. Scott deserves more than a haphazard, and contrived, contest story and a paper thin romance.

Luckily Mr. Scott is around to buoy the action with some relationship nuggets that are probably easy to look past on first glance. The volleyball scene has become infamous throughout the years for its buried homoeroticism. In fact, Top Gun has earned a large reputation for its homoerotic tendencies in general. That's what's on the surface, but for those who give Mr. Scott's films more than surface respect there's more than homoeroticism at play. The world of Top Gun is a man's world and Mr. Scott's film is all about the way that men define themselves and their relationships in a man's world. This has grown to be a common trend I find in Mr. Scott's work, but Top Gun is the first film I can recall taking on a distinctive "relationship as definition" feel from Mr. Scott. Volleyball isn't just an excuse for muscled up men to take their shirts off and give off gay vibes. It's a chance for them to do that and to seek to establish dominance within the male relationships that make up the world of Top Gun. Trust me, looking at Mr. Scott's films, especially Top Gun, from a relationship perspective opens his film up for a lot more discussion.

Not all of Top Gun is up to snuff, but it was never up to snuff to begin with. Top Gun is a film that excels in the areas where it needs to excel, and fails in the areas that never interested Mr. Scott in the first place. Male relationships, Anthony Edwards, and keen fighter jet action, that's what Top Gun brings to the table. I'm down for sitting at the table with Top Gun. I greatly enjoy the elements that Top Gun gets right. I have major issues with the lesser areas of Top Gun, but at the end of the day the positives outweigh the negatives, mouth roof licking be damned!

Rating:

7/10

Cheers,
Bill Thompson

Episode #234: Wake in Fright Nosferatu

Welcome back to the GGtMC!!!

This week we bring you our diabolikdvd.com sponsored episode and it was Large William's turn to program the show and he chose Wake in Fright (1971) directed by Ted Kotcheff and Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979) directed by Werner Herzog. The dynamics between the two films were very interesting and very familiar.

Direct download: ggtmc_234.mp3

Emails to midnitecinema@gmail.com

Voicemails to 206-666-5207

Adios!!!

R.I.P. Ray Harryhausen - Guest Post by Max Bursztynski

The first recollection I have of Ray Harryhausen is watching the Mother Goose short “Little Red Riding Hood” I remember being absolutely entranced by the characters, especially their quirky, cartoonish takes on the human face; their large eyes, well rounded cheeks and curved mouths making their expressions a little cheeky, somewhat mischievous in appearance. I couldn’t have been much older than 6 when I first discovered this world which was, in the most literal form of the word, magical. I would often wake up on a Saturday and run downstairs to put in the disk of his shorts, all of which I had watched multiple times and, in most cases, memorised.

After a while, I borrowed out from the local video library Ray’s original “Mighty Joe Young”. I was, again in awe of Harryhausen’s ability to sculpt a creature and, in a godlike manner, breathe life into this wad of mere clay and wire. This man, in my mind, must have been one of the great geniuses of the world to be able to create such fluid, lifelike motion from an inanimate puppet. This gorilla, maybe because it moved in such a human way or perhaps because it had the trademark Harryhausen semi-cartoonish look, was an incredibly sympathetic character that I could laugh with and cry with as if he were an old friend.

Years later, I got a box set of his best action/fantasy movies for my birthday. In this was “Jason and the Argonauts”, “The 7^th Voyage of Sinbad”, “The Golden Voyage of Sinbad”, “Sinbad and the Eye of the Tiger” and “The 3 Worlds of Gulliver”. I was, as you can imagine, ecstatic. I stayed up long nights to live these adventures, to sail the seas and meet the Cyclops, the giant squirrel and the eternal swashbuckling skeletons. These movies were more immersive and more enjoyable than just about any other films that I had and have ever watched. The vivid colours and the exciting action just overwhelmed me.

I was obviously upset when I found out that the great pioneer of animation had passed away. He had a good run. 92 years’ worth of great entertainment for all ages. He was a truly great man in the animation realm; he brought many new animating tactics on to the table. I would like to finish up by saying may you rest in peace you magnificent man. Your work will always be remembered. May you continue to animate in the land hereafter.

Max Bursztynski

Satanik (1967)

When I was a child, I had very thick, naturally curly hair (think of Frieda of Peanuts fame, but with dark brown locks rather than ginger).  What a pain in the ass combing it was.  In high school, I wielded the perennial mullet for which the era is largely famous (okay, derided).  Being into hardcore punk music, I shaved my head a lot towards the end of my high school tenure.  Then a magical thing happened.  Around my sophomore year of college, my hair began to thin on top.  Naturally, I did what any sane person would do when faced with this threat to any sort of a healthy sex life (which was a non-concern, since I was generally like a deer whistle to women anyway, probably due to my shitty attitude which was in part [surely] caused by my thinning hair); I grew the rest of my hair down to about the middle of my back.  Ugh.  

After about a year with a ponytail that would curl up faster than an insect’s legs under a lit match, I began shaving my head again.  For the majority of my college years, as well as my first few years in the fulltime work force, I also maintained a goatee, which I thought looked really good, since it was very dark and, on either side of the corners of my mouth and going down my chin, were two stripes of red hair.  Regardless, once I shaved off the goatee, I realized that I looked better without it, and have remained clean shaven ever since.  It’s funny to me that the number of men who voluntarily shave their heads has gone up exponentially from when I was young and the practice was culturally unacceptable (sort of how you’d be hard-pressed to swing a dead cat in a high school these days and not hit a teen who has at least one future-shameworthy tattoo).  But as an uncle of mine once said, “Why cultivate on my head what grows rampant around my asshole?”  What does any of this have to do with anything?  A short while ago, I noticed grey hairs sprouting up on my chest.  Apparently, the laughs never end.  My point is, learn from my example.  Grow old gracefully, for Christ’s sake.

The late Piero Vivarelli’s (who even makes an appearance in the film as a police commissioner) Satanik opens in the driving rain as elderly, scarred (we have no idea why, and we are never given a reason) Dr. Marny Bannister (Magda Konopka, perhaps better known as one of the Cave Babes in When Dinosaurs Ruled The Earth) hails a cab and goes to Dr. Greaves’ (the late Nerio Bernardi, perhaps better known as an Inspector in the great Caltiki The Undying Monster) laboratory.  Bannister tells Greaves that the numbers he gave her appear accurate, and their animal experiments into cellular regeneration have produced positive results.  When Bannister volunteers to be the first human subject for the serum, Greaves scoffs.  Bannister casually murders her friend (partner?  Bannister acts as if she is a visitor to the lab, but she has been privy, evidently, from the start to Greaves’ work), downs the potion (dry ice bubbles and all), turns into a young sex kitten, and sets off on a journey with no seeming deeper meaning than to make money (something she surely could have done without supermodel looks, yes?).  Tepid on her trail is British Inspector Trent (the late Julio Peña, perhaps better known as the Inspector in the fantastic Horror Express), though his talents don’t even come close to those of Detective Frank Drebin.  Is that all there is?  Yes.

While Greaves makes reference to the classic tale of Faust, this film actually hues closer to The Strange Case Of Dr. Jekyll And Mr. Hyde.  There’s the bubbling potion and the actual physical transformation of the main character.  There’s the transformation in character from meek, sheepish Bannister to fiery, coquettish Bannister.  Interestingly, Hyde is described by Stevenson (if memory serves) as being shorter and more brutish than Jekyll.  He is more of an animal at first sight, and he provides a straightforward visual motif for the story’s theme.  That he becomes as prominent as he does, I think, is part of the author’s point about not only Jekyll but about society in general at the time (and into the present, part of what makes it so popular being its prescience).  

Funny, isn’t it that when this same story idea is applied to women, they always go from being ugly, little, troll-like things to being super-hot sex bombs (the only exception to this from the male side that springs to my mind is Jerry Lewis’s The Nutty Professor)?  Nonetheless, Bannister’s personality (what little there is) doesn’t seem to change the same as her appearance.  More precisely, it seems to change whenever the script calls for it to change (and Konopka plays it blank as a chalkboard, regardless).  Initially, I thought that the story was a bizarre drug abuse metaphor, especially the first time Bannister transforms back from glamorous to gruesome.  She writhes, and she appears to be in physical pain, as if she were hitting the worst of a junkie’s withdrawal symptoms.  The idea of the comedown being more powerful than the high intrigued me for an instant, notably if we were to take into account the difference in personalities.  And that’s when it hit me; there is no difference between ugly Bannister and beautiful Bannister.  The two are equally venal, self-serving, bloodthirsty creatures.  The only true contrast is that the better-looking version attracts men physically.  Why, then, not make a more interesting (and likely more satisfying) film about an ugly woman who improves her station in life by every ruthless, sanguinary means that could be conjured up?  We’ll never know, and this is the film we have been left with, so we don’t really have a choice in the matter.  So, there.

This film truly should work far better than it does, in my opinion.  It has an attractive lead (not the strongest actress, but still…), an interesting core which could have been run with in any number of directions, all of which could have proven entertaining from an exploitation angle alone.  The filmmakers took advantage of none of that.  Instead, they threw together a bunch of scenes, which are too similar to maintain a viewer’s attention and too disconnected to form any sort of cohesive story (I believe this was adapted from a comic book, so likely the disjointed, episodic nature springs from that, but I don’t buy that as an excuse).  Not only is there no character development, but the characters themselves are so threadbare they’re almost transparent.  There is no tension throughout the entire film.  Every scene is exactly what it looks like.  There is no subtext, no meaning, and above all else, no fucking fun.  Satanik is an okay idea in search of a serviceable film.  It didn’t find one.

MVT:  The über-lounge-y soundtrack is very catchy (if it’s available as an album, I would recommend picking it up), and for much of the film’s runtime I found myself paying more attention to the music than what was onscreen (always a good sign).  Some of the tracks sounded familiar to me, though I couldn’t place from where, yet the music in the film is credited to Manuel Parada, so let’s give some credit to the man.   

Make Or Break:  The Break was the lengthy Flamenco dance sequences after Bannister has hooked up with jewel smuggler Van Donen (Umberto Raho, perhaps better known as an Inspector in the better-than-this Baron Blood).  No Flamenco hater I, these scenes drag on for what seems like eons.  I’m no stranger to padding (and neither is the world of genre cinema), but when the travelogue-esque pieces of a film stand out in your memory stronger than anything going on with the story (and, again, that’s giving this a lot more praise than it deserves), trouble is a-brewin’.

Score:  4/10

Candy Stripe Nurses (1974)

Writer and Director Alan Holleb

Runtime: 76 minutes

This is the kind of movie that got me interested in midnight movies in the first place. Lots of topless actresses, a plot you can take or leave and funky bass guitar for background music. And my b movie hero Roger Corman produced this movie through New World Pictures.

The movie opens with a cartoonish opening showing candy stripe nurses getting into sexual high jinks with the doctors and patients. Sadly the opening music has more in common with a dental drill than music. I strongly suggest hitting mute through this as it gets annoying quick.

The first candy striper we are introduced to is Marisa (played by María Rojo). Marisa is a rebel because she is wooden stake and ignoring the stereotypical nice guy trying to ask her out to a Owen Boles concert. She is forced into becoming a candy striper because a teacher took away her stake carving knife so she beats the living daylights out of that teacher.

Our stereotypical nice guy then introduces the second candy striper Dianne (played by Robin Mattson). A hipster, soon to be medical student and all around art snob. She is becoming a candy striper to gain experience in the medical field. Dianne blows off the nice guy by saying Owen Boles has never been able to sing the right note.

The last candy striper is Sandy (played by Candice Rialson). She meets the stereotypical nice guy off screen and he gives both tickets to her because she is nicest girl he talked to all day. She explains all this to her doctor boyfriend and then tells him about how he is taking to that same concert. Sandy is a straight A student who has her doctor boyfriend do her homework and always willing to hop into bed with any guy as part of her candy striper duties.

The boob free plot is straight forward and in three sections. Section one is Marisa carrying out her punishment as a candy striper. She meets a guy wrong fully accused of a gas station robbery and decides to help clear the guy's name for no real reason. During her investigation she finds a reluctant witness to the robbery, the guys that committed the gas station robbery and gets shot. All of this leads to the charges being dropped and Marisa being less of rebel.

In section two, Dianne starts her candy striper career by annoying the living daylights out of a doctor stupid enough to allow her to follow him around. This leads her to meet the college basket ball star who comes her love interest. He is addicted to amphetamines and Dianne saves his life after his drug addiction actions lead  to another trip to the hospital.

In the last section, Sandy takes a break from sleeping with the doctors and patients. Instead she volunteers to be the sectary for the hospital’s sex clinic. While there she sets herself up as a sex therapist so she can sleep with  Owen Boles (played by Kendrew Lascelle). Owen had to go to the sex clinic because his music was suffering due to getting too much willing sex from groupies. Sandy helps him by first rejecting him and nearly getting raped by him as well.

This movie is billed as a comedy thriller but fails at both. The comedic part are forced and stupid for the sake of being stupid. The best example of this is the cop at the end of the movie that can't get his gun out of the holster and need the criminal to help him. This movie also is about as thrilling as an episode of Scooby-Doo.

MVT: Well shot, cast who give a damn about being there and some beautiful actresses.

Make or Break: The opening and closing music (it is the same damn song) broke it for me. I know licensing music is expensive even back in the 1970's. But for the love of Cthulhu hire someone who can sing without being annoying.

Score: 5.25/10

Soldier (1998)

I suppose that if Soldier was made now,it would be a more soulful film,looking deep into the mind of a man who's undergone decades of conditioning and discipline,and his struggle to awaken the humanity that's been buried.

We didn't get that when Paul W.S. Anderson made Soldier back in 1998....we got a film that harkened back to the 80's,when a lone hero would face a bloody battle against superior forces in a post apocalyptic wasteland. Unlike those films,Soldier had a big budget and a script by Blade Runner scribe David Peoples,and the always dependable Kurt Russell.

And it flopped,bigtime. Soldier was defeated by audience apathy,and in my opinion,that's a damned shame. Maybe it's because Russell was playing an emotionally blank character....no wisecracking Jack Burton to be had here,nor a supercynical badass Snake Plissken. Nope,there was nothing for people to relate to....well,almost.

I must admit that Soldier must have been a hard sell - the opening montage features a scene in which Russell kills an enemy soldier (and an unfortunate human shield who gets in the way) may have alienated people. But to Russell's credit,it's his skill as an actor which manages to reveal that there's still a glimmer of humanity to be had as the story unfolds,made all the more difficult by the fact that he has hardly any dialogue - it's the use of body language and facial reactions which illustrates what's going on. He's simply a man who's been made to follow orders,but by the end of the film,he's making decisions for himself.

And let's talk about the last act of this film. Paul W.S. Anderson gets alot of flak,but he showed alot of promise with this and Event Horizon. His love for science fiction/action films is well known,and it's arguable that he either payed homage or ripped off films - whatever the case,it works here. I absolutely loved watching Kurt Russell wreak unholy war upon Jason Scott Lee and his genetically engineered troops during the film's bloody climax. Nothing fancy about it,just good old fashioned violence - and although the final fight between Russell and Lee maybe be cliched (thunder and lightning!),there's just something primal about watching two men beat the crap out of each other.

Overall,i'd rate Soldier 8/10 - far from obsolete.

ELVIS IN MAY: BUT WHY MAY?

Why exactly did the Encore cable channel pick May to do an Elvis Month and show Elvis movies all May long?

Its not Elvis' birthday month, its not Elvis' death day, so, what then? 

There was those string of crazy shows at Lake Tahoe in May 1976. One was immortalized on bootleg with the title, wait for it,  A CRAZY SHOW AT LAKE TAHOE. I wish that CD had a better cover - I would have  used it for this post. I know of things like that concert on May 29, 1977 when Elvis was so out of his mind, he left the stage altogether in the middle of the show, just up and left mid-song and then came back to the stage a half hour or so later, slightly reinvigorated. This show was immortalized on bootleg with the title, wait for it, SEND ME THE LIGHT...I NEED IT BAD.  I wish that CD had a better cover - I would have  used it for this post.

These are not things the Encore folks would even know about much less want to anniversarize (is that a word?). 

Frankly, I was stumped and started looking on the internet -- there HAD to be an answer, right? I mean, we dont live in a random universe, do we?

Well, a few clicks on the internet made me realize that I am getting old and forgetting all I have learned about Elvis in all my years of Elvis obsession.

Thanks to the Elvis History Blog (http://www.elvis-history-blog.com/elvis-in-may.html), I am reminded that there are many reasons to schedule an Elvis Month of Elvis Movies in the month of May, many anniversaries to celebrate. 

Feel free to raise a glass of wine and toast for any of the following reasons:

Elvis in May: A list of important events that occurred in May during the life and career of Elvis Presley

May 5, 1956 —Elvis's first RCA album, titled simply “Elvis Presley,” reached #1 on Billboard's album chart.

May 2, 1960 — Principal photography onG.I. Blues, Elvis’s fifth movie, began at Paramount’s Hollywood studios.

May 23, 1962 — Elvis’s ninth movie,Follow That Dream, opened in theaters nationwide.

May 26, 1963 —Elvis recorded "Devil in Disguise" at RCA’s Studio B in Nashville.

May 29, 1963 — Priscilla Beaulieu graduated from Immaculate Conception High School in Memphis.

May 1, 1967 —Elvis and Priscilla were married at the Aladdin Hotel in Las Vegas.

Elvis in May: Birthdays of Prominent People in Elvis’s World

May 12 — Millie Perkins, who costarred with Elvis in 1961’s Wild in the Country, was born in 1938.

May 13 — Memphis disc jockey Dewey Phillips, who is credited with being the first DJ to play an Elvis record on the radio, was born in 1926.

May 16 — Two of Elvis's movie costars were born on the same day in 1937: Yvonne Craig (It Happened At the World’s Fair and Kissin’ Cousins) and Jocelyn Lane (Tickle Me).

May 18 — Joan Blackman, Elvis’s costar in Blue Hawaii and Kid Galahad,was born in 1938.

May 23 — Linda Thompson, who was Elvis’s girlfriend for four and a half years starting in 1972, was born in 1950.

May 24 — Priscilla Presley was born in 1945.

May 27 — Fred Wise, composer of over 30 songs, including “Wooden Heart,” for Elvis, was born in 1915.

ELVIS IN MAY: STAY AWAY JOE

Given that it is Elvis Month on the Encore cable channel this month, I thought I would use my first postings on the GGTMC blog to share my thoughts, memories, hopes, dreams and wishes for all things Elvis. I've been an Elvs fan, like BIG Elvis fan, since forever. Like any member of the GGTMC family, one of my great loves is talking about movies. I could talk about movies for hours and hours. But (and maybe this is unlike other members of the GGTMC family), I could also talk about Elvis for hours and hours. Ironically, one thing I certainly cannot do is talk about Elvis movies for hours and hours.  I am an Elvis fan, like BIG Elvis fan, but I'm not crazy insane. 

Encore is running Elvis movies throughout the month, on repeat mode, one Elvis movie a day for the whole month. One cant fault Encore's choice of titles: among others, there's KING CREOLE, JAILHOUSE ROCK, BLUE HAWAII, SPEEDWAY, SPINOUT and CHANGE OF HABIT (OK, maybe fault that last one).  These are all great examples of the iconographic nature of Elvis movies. Yes, thats right: an Elvis movie is a category unto itself. Hitchcock movies are Hitchcockian; Kubrick movies are Kubrickian; an Elvis movie is "An Elvis Movie". Encore's setlist has 'em all: Elvis: young & black-and-white raw; Elvis: in Hawaii; Elvis: in racing cars; Elvis: starring opposite Mary Taylor Moore playing a nun. 

I haven't seen these Elvis movies in a while although I could probably write reviews just from my memories. I will be watching these titles this month (a few already await on the DVR) so i will hold off writing reviews of each of these title until I actually watch 'em.

What else is new in Elvis World lately that I can talk about? 

Well, the FTD label (which is the official, Graceland-sanctioned "bootleg" label that is dedicated to releasing outtakes from Elvis recording sessions as well as soundboard recordings of concerts) has just released a special edition CD of the soundtrack to STAY AWAY JOE.  This has to be considered something of a feat given that the movie only contained four (!) songs. Anyway, I am actually hot to get this if only because it seems like a looooong time since I heard any new Elvis at all, much less some new Elvis that really gave me that old tingle, or any tingle, if you must know.  So it is out of this desperation, this starvation, that I am kinda salivating at the track listing.

But wait, the movie...a few words. Not many. I cant say too much about, I've never seen it, I've never ever really wanted to see it either. Elvis as a Native American(!). For the second time in his movie career(!!).  Oy.

Back in the day of only seven television channels (yes, just seven, and some of them didnt come in too clearly, either), I dont think STAY AWAY JOE played very often. I dont recall it being part of the regular line-up of The 4:30 Movie when they showed an Elvis movie every day for a week and I rushed home from school to see them. That's when they showed DOUBLE TROUBLE, SPINOUT, SPEEDWAY, GIRL HAPPY, HARUM SCARUM. The good ones. Yes, you heard me. Shut Up, yes, I like HARUM SCARUM. So, not only that, I dont recall ever seeing STAY AWAY JOE on, say, The Saturday Afternoon Movie, The Saturday Night Movie, The Sunday Afternoon Movie or any other day-of-the-week-movie.  They showed movies all the time back then. But STAY AWAY JOE rarely showed up. So I didnt see it and I didnt miss it.

Even today, there are other points of interest that might make me take just a quick look at it: the presence of LQ Jones and Burgess Meredith and even Joe Esposito, an Elvis flunky who later became Elvis' closest consigliere when things turned dark and the Memphis Mafia went from Hollywood Romp to Coppola Shakespeare, and the presence of Charlie Hodge, an Elvis flunky who later became Elvis' irritating stage foil when Elvis let this fool on-stage to sing harmony during the concert years (the latter two are just cameos, credited as "Uncredited" for the former and "(Uncredited) Guitar Player" for the latter, but I like playing those spot-the-who games when watching movies). I do remain forever curious as how they fit the song "Dominic" (about more in a minute) into the story and what's going on when he sings it (about more in a minute). But no, I dont really want to see it. No burning desire to see it. Elvis looks great, amazingly great, like even-I'd-fuck-him-maybe great, he is growing into his lean, mean 1968 Comeback look after years of carrying Hollywood flab. But, no. Elvis as a Native American(!). For the second time in his movie career(!!).  Oy.

I do like the songs tho. I dont wanna see the movie. But I like the songs. They are perfect examples of an Elvis movie song, for good and for bad. They dont rise above that label (like the way a lot of the songs in BLUE HAWAII and JAILHOUSE ROCK rise above the Elvis-movie-song label, and transcend into honest-to-goodness bona fide memorable songs). There's more of those kinds of Elvis movie songs (honest-to-goodness bona fide memorable songs) than most people might think. But thats a discussion for another time. But the songs of STAY AWAY JOE are Elvis movie songs, no more, no less. I like 'em.

Apparently, there are songs that were recorded for the movie but werent used in the actual movie (and, in the case of "Dominic" never released until much later, after Elvis' death). But, never having seen the movie, I cant tell you which songs actually made the cut. But all of these songs appear on the new CD so lets discuss 'em.

"Stay Away, Joe" - so, full confession: I am partial to this song, a soft spot: it was the opening track of one of my first Elvis LPs (the "Lets Be Friends" LP on the budget label Camden, purchased at a WoolWorths for maybe $1.99 in the early 1970s and which remains my favorite of the Camden LPs). The song is a sprightly hoedown number that is rather catchy. It always made my cassette tape mixes, before and after the advent of Sony walkmans.

"All I Needed Was the Rain"- OK, again, I am partial to this because this song appeared on another of my first Elvis LPs (the "Singer Presents Elvis Sings Flaming Star" LP, although I didnt have the original Singer release but the Camden reissue that, yes, I purchased at a WoolWorths for maybe $1.99 in the early 1970s).

[The "Elvis - C'mon Everybody" was my first ever Elvis LP purchase (well, my mom purchased it, of course). Yes, purchased at a WoolWorths for maybe $1.99 in the early 1970s. After that, the chronology becomes fuzzy, which LP purchased in which order, but they were all Camdens from the cut-out bins. My first bona-fide RCA label LP, the first purchased-at-a-record-store-for-full-price LP (well, my mom purchased it, of course) was "Raised on Rock". Stop here, we can pick this topic up in a later post.]

Anyway. "All I Needed Was the Rain". A really great song. A great Elvis movie song. Comes close to rising above and transcending but its a bit too short. Still. Love it. An after-hours, weary-country-blues number with a spare country blues acoustic guitar and harmonica. When I have the time and I sit and try to learn how to play my own (beginners) acoustic guitar, this song is the one I try to work on playing.

"Dominic" - The infamous "Dominic". Now, of course, this song is not defensible in any way. Its a prime example of the bad Elvis movie song, the punch line people have in mind when they ridicule an Elvis movie.  Elvis. Singing. A song that is sung to a bull (!) who is apparently not interested in shagging any female bulls(!!). You can see why I remain curious as to how, exactly, the script leads up to Elvis just throwing out his hands, swivelin' his hips and bursting into this song. My curiosity is intensified further by the fact that Wikipedia points out that, in the movie, Elvis sings the song to two women and there is no bull in the scene. (No, I still wont see the movie). But, Ok. Still. I like it. Its silly, I know. Maybe its not even music as the term "music" is understood by the intelligentsia. But I like it. I even put it on the mix I play for my 5-year old and my 2-year old, when I put each of them to bed.

"U.S. Male" - Macho braggadocio from The King. What turns this into something great (that word again!) is the inspired guitar picking of Jerry Reed that drives the song. The words may be a poor caricature of someone claiming to be a bad ass but Elvis puts on his game-face and attacks it and Reed's guitar turns this into a countryboy's call to arms.

"Too Much Monkey Business" - ...and while we are on the subject of Elvis' game-face and Reed's guitar picking, it appears again on this (incredible, I think) cover of a Chuck Berry song. Yes, this too appeared on that "Singer Presents Elvis Sings Flaming Star" LP but thats not the reason I love this. Its a quality song and features an engaged Elvis giving this one his all. I sincerely doubt this had any connection to STAY AWAY JOE, I doubt it was recorded for, but not included in, STAY AWAY JOE, but FTD has chosen to include this anyway.  They are padding this CD a little bit but whatever.

"Stay Away" - I have heard slow versions of this song and fast versions. I like the slow version. Its not a great song. Singing about the great outdoors. Its meh. But if I had a choice, I would pick the slow version. This is the song that is set to the tune of "Greensleeves". I have never heard "Greensleeves" so I dont know if that sentence ("This is the song that is set to the tune of "Greensleeves".") is hilarious or not.

"Going Home" - following on from meh, here's another one. Undistinguished. Singing about the great outdoors again. Meh.

So, now, what is the FTD CD offering, and why do I care.

Two words for ya:

Outtakes.

Here are some more words for ya:

Outtakes of "Dominic".

Here is the complete track list:

01. Stay Away
02. Stay Away, Joe
03. Dominic
04. All I Needed Was The Rain
05. Goin' Home
06. Too Much Monkey Business
07. U. S. Male
08. Stay Away (jam, take 2)
09. Too Much Monkey Business (takes 1,3,6,9)
10. U.S. Male (takes (5,6,7)
11. Stay Away, Joe (takes 10,12,13)
12. Stay Away, Joe (takes 15,16,17)
13. Dominic (takes 1,3,2)
14. All I Needed Was The Rain (unprocessed master)
15. Too Much Monkey Business (takes 12,10)
16. Goin' Home (takes 12,18,21)
17. Goin' Home (takes 22,24,26,28,29)
18. Stay Away (takes 5,6)
19. Stay Away (takes 11,12,14)
20. U.S. Male (takes 9,10)
21. U.S. Male (take 11)

But what do I want to hear most of all? Yes, you better believe it. The outtakes of "Dominic". I really do. This could be really fun. Studio sessions where Elvis is trying to wrap his tongue around the stupidest songs are often hilarious.  One need only think back to the outtakes of "A Dog's Life" and "Datin" from the recording sessions for the PARADISE HAWAIIAN STYLE soundtrack? or the outtakes for "Beach Shack" from the SPINOUT sessions?

On a more serious level, the outtakes for "Too Much Monkey Business" also promise gold. If. If these particular takes havent been released already. I know we have heard at least take 9, I think, on an earlier FTD movie outtake collection. Its kickin too, esp when Elvis does an incredible bit of patented Elvis business with one of the lyrics. I love this take even more than the released (master) version. I am not sure how many of the other takes collected on this new CD may have been previously released so my fingers are crossed we have some new unheard material.

I am incredulous that there are no outtakes of "All I Needed Was the Rain". Like, not at all. Not one. That is simply an unconscionable omission by FTD.

The sessions for "U.S. Male" have already been extensively bootlegged so I dont expect there will be anything new here.

The CD track listing doesnt specify if the outtakes of "Stay Away" are of the slow version or the fast version. But I think "Stay Away" has also been pretty much covered by the bootleggers (if not by FTD themselves) already as has "Stay Away Joe" and "Going Home".

So, not a lot to look forward to, but the little bit that I am looking forward to could be gold.

Cant wait to pick it up.

But I still dont wanna see the movie.